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…..well since the WILDFIRE will be taking over everything,lets pray that they will be going for the world champ. in years time.

i felt lonely at times as i really miss him(sheng han,kenneth)back there i help myself to do a little countdown on my own on how long will it takes for me to be back there with him.as time flies,and here’s the time to fly back to KL for some summer break!!!:D well,its fun to be back to meet and catch up with my family and friends as i haven seen them for quite a while now!!!and yuen yee….jie good to see you again…miss u so much man!!!!!hehe…

20/11/07…this is the day i got my result and my judment test back via email.got HD for almost all subject.only mask got merit…but is ok….im happy enough to get this good result as i didnt really attand most classes…..haha….

MS LIEW…here i come for class with you again…..miss having class with you but….i put on weight..like heaps….hehe^^CY here i come too…hehe^^miss me leh….but this time i din improve or im not used to teacher teaching already…dun noe….and this is how year 2007 pass for me….goodbye year 2007 and hi year 2008…may the new year begins with joy for everyone……

……………………………..yeah……………………………..

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Hey,its time for me to write here again…i know i know…some of u must be thinking why i haven update any of my blog till like…now…hmmm well im busy…for exmas,shopping,clubbing,holidays and many more…haha…so..yea..i’ve been away for like a year now from malaysia and now that im back here for holidays and im so not used to it yet…tho its like months already…oh well….anyway..let me tell u my journey for the whole year of 2007.

well,early of last year i fly to melbourne all alone to study and its like so lonely but i told myself tat i hav to be strong to finish my 1st year atleast.now that a year has passed and im gonna do my final year for it and im loving it already…didnt wan to fly back but mum asked to come back.sigh..life in every country is different but we must stay strong…no matter what happened we must stay as strong as possible.i came back quite a few times but did not do much loo..

then i got to know my current bf kenneth and we are still together and getting much better tho…anyway tat is not important.the most important thing is me and him will be together FOREVER!!!we started dating when i was back for easter break(2weeks)and i tot it was just a "game" for 2weeks only but i really din know tat we can still be togehter until now….its like…a year now….our love got deeper and deeper each time we meet so i dun noe how am i gonna stay there for like another year again…but i just hope he will visit me over there loo…I’LL MISS HIM FOR SURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!as im back here,i wrote heaps of poems or him but he only replys me"wah!!!!so free ar write so many for me"im like…WTH!!!i take my time to write all thoses words tat i long din used and now im using it just for him. he said those word to me…sad laa…but nevermind i asked jesus to make me happy everyday. for now for sure…I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!darling i really love and miss u….

hmmmm….for cheerleading,we started of with the REDBACKS for RMIT uni then we got ot know omre team out there and what other promotion we can do to promote our team to the country. its been a wonderfull time cheering for them but too bad year2008 there iszit any REDBACKS team anymore but there is WILDFIRE the new team coach by letty fox. hmmm…i miss her so much…miss having hot choc at starbucks with her man…we usually text each other to have starbucks and sushi before training.this is so gay…we love having the same food and drinks…and best part was she is my cheer coach and…can u imagine her telling me this during training?"lil,thinking of sushi when u’re up there(flyer)..hanging above u and wanting u to eat them"(lil is my name called over there)and i can reply her tat…"oh sure i will keep tight and eat them"lol…funny la…but seriously i put on so much weight over there..IM NOT JOKING!!!!I PUT ON 10KGS!!!!!!but now im happy..i lost about 8kgs already… we won quite alot of throphy and we failed b4 but we din just give up on wat we’re doing so…we told our self MUST STAY STRONG!!!! and finally we did it!!!we got 1st place during states and 2nd place for nationals.and that we’re not happy for the result as we know we can do a better job there…but too bad the REDBACKS team might not able to go for competition already and now its time for the new team WILDFIRE to take over the champ. hahaha….

……..to be continue……………

Hey i’m back again…last month was a mess for the redbacks.we went for our first ever international competition and got 4th runner up at the gold cost and after that we came back to melbourne and had another competition and got 1st and overall 1st iszint it amazing? although everyone was badly sick.:(

anyway 2weeks after that we had our trial out for the newbiess and they were all great although there is only 4newbiess joined the team we are happy enough to have them in our team…we will work more stunts and will hopefully get them to do a good thumbling. this month we had out gym training at the wesley collage and we had so much fun that even me as a flyer wanna do more thumbling and can u imagine me doing a front hand spring? and will do a back hand spring in no time? we did a little training on how good is our thumbling skills and we were devided into smalll groups. we had fun…

well…now we have less than 8weeks for our next competition and less than 2months is our nationals damn…i’m so not prepare for the next competition as we are all busy with assignments and also finals.sigh..but what can we do?we have to go for uni,cheer training, gym training,ballet(me only),hiphop class, and many other activities like clubing…lol!!!anyway i just dont wanna mess things up thats all..

well…i think i dont wanna write more for now as i’m going out soon…and its bloody cold now!!!!and i haven been sleeping for ages!!!been busy with my assignments and also projects!!!damn!!!!!nationals is soon….

today 27th of May it’s a sad day for me as i injurt my spine and it’s an old injury sigh!!!i didnt know until i cry and felt the pain.i didnt expect me to cry on the spot but i did which mean it’s really F***ing pain. i dont usually cry or say anything when i gets the pain but this time it’s like super hyper pain loo dont know why also:(when i fall that time i was like black out already cause i remember doctor told me that i cant hurt the same place again as i wont be able to dance again(IF i cant stand up)so i quickly ask james to help me up and yes i did stand and kindda pain tho but it’s ok cause i know what i want in life. i told myself "lilian, you can do it de"and once again i told myself not to give up on what i’m doing and i did again i continue the steps and studs but my coach letty didnt let me go up again as i hurt my back so she said " it’s either you sit there or mark the steps only" so i decided to mark the steps along with the others. i came back and they help me to my room and gosh!!!i didnt know that i’m that light haha..yea…i’m little(laugh at me)i pray so hard to stay in the team and to be the best dancer and also ice skater but too bad it didnt turns up to be what i wanted but is ok cause i know i’m strong enough to help myselg on everything.

i told daniel about it and he was like WHAT????u hurt your self again ar??what happen???asked loads of question but i just said i’m fine dont worry so much!!!!and he said…"NO!!!!i cant zip my mouth if u dont see a doctor right now!!!"i’m like how to find a doctor and i dont have the money for doctor as  i finished up on my production which is next week!!!sigh!!!everything is not done yet dont how la now!!!!should i stay in and do my assignments???should i continue what i’m doing now like goes to uni everyday and sit aside??hmmmdont know….but now i really felt like crying laa cause he still care for me(for no reason)just felt like it only!!!!when i told him about it i was like fingercross that he dont call me!!!!cause i know he would scolded me!!!i didnt want him to do like this cause i know i would actually goes back to him which i cant cause i have some1 waiting for me le…tell me what to do now??which one to go for???D orK???no idea…i really love both of them!!!!sigh!!!stress la now!!!!but now i’ll go for K as both of us(D) knows that we cant be together(reason for it is too good for each other)lol….the biggest joke i ever heard!!!!hahaa…..anyway i love kenneth and also daniel no comments on them!!!both are equally good to mua!!!!

production was going really good and ballet was awesome and i actually gets a credit from my new teacher(whom suppose to be teaching us but went for germany to examine people over there)she said i need to hard a little harder to be the best in class. pass de duex was great!!!as i have new partner today and nick said i have improved heaps on it and could be polished more on it!!!haha…so happy today!!!!how nice to have a examinor to teach us!!!!haha

ice skating!!!hmmm DAMN MISS IT LAA>>>>

cheerleading…sigh dun say la…see the above that i’ve written laa…sad la to say about it!!!!

Hi all,it’s been a while since i last went back to KL sigh…and i really misses the good time with all my friends back there…*sigh again*since i’m not coming back on winter,i wanna write something nice about the life i have over here:)well!!!it is true that everyone now is hyper busy with assignments/exams or evan finals coming up and i have been hyper busy with my assignments,exams and also my cheerleading team. As i’m doing the dance along with 2other people name Rodi and Lucky and we will be putting up all our talent in dance and we just finished our sport festival.here are some nice picture of me in some studs

and this is 1of my studs in the routine.well..of cz i’m not there since they started as i still have my usual class which is Movement and Improvasation Nick class…i really enjoy Nick’s class cause he gives us alot of imagination and we are allow to use new ideas…well,there are more pictures coming along while u’re reading this blog…. As you can see,i’m above of every1..hehe…*no wonder i’m so tall*like DUHHHH!!!!!You might ask,why are we wearing all black?well,not only black we hav we hav red as well cz black and red makes a good combination colour=)the person standing in front is the coach and friends but when ever we are in training time we are always coach and students but after that it’s friend time again…hehe^^  u might probably cant see anything but dun worry…tat small little girl in the middle is tat me??and yes it’s me!!!!and the one in each side they are twins….hmm….u might also ask do we get long to form tis group???hmmm…mayb yes….and mayb no….cz everythings seem2be good and smooth…we 1st started off wid how many ppl we wan in d team,then to wat colour the uniforms should be,when’s the practice/training time,how many time per week,should we join the next competition?,and not 4getting the dance routines and bla bla bla…there’s so many tings 2 talk about when it comes to tis question…. and here’s our competition’s uniform and everytime during pratice we hav new pics coming up and we’ve been doing really hard2 be the 1st in level2but who knows???mayb we are 1 of the best…:)i’m so priud of my team…i love my team…we took care of each other and help each other up with the steps,studs and even routine…haha…talk baout routine i haven finsih my routine yet cz i really no time4it and not only me but rodi and lucky too….we r all so busy wid exams and guess wat??we still hav time2 go 4practice ….like me,i’m so busy with uni,ballet and i still hav tine3cheer practice…*never miss any practice tho*hehe… okokok…lets not talk about cheer in case some1 gets bored…

well…lets talk about my uni…hmmm…since i’m doing PA,wat can i say???everythig was awsome and i really like my classmates we sometime even tot we r fr d same family…hhe^^hmm…vocal is so not good as me and lisa is the only high speech voice and it’s so not fun wid it cz we r both in the same level…sigh….but clown…i do hav fun cz i HATE clown as usual but now i hav2 be 1 of them and i really like it cz i can make ppl happy..hehe^^tho we dun really hav pics from tis class cz no1 seem to be free 2 hold the cameras and no body seem 2care abt it cz we all got so deep into the world of every class we hav….but i only got 1 pic where we all see the play of grace…. hmm….it really been a while tat i haven been to skating luuuu…wanna skate laa…wanna hav part of my life back laa…sigh….

i remember i was so happy when i’m still skating tat time but now…hmmm..yes…i am happy but it seem like something has gone missing.i’ve been thinking very long since i hav tis feeling…i asked myself why am i so sad na dit’s like something is missing in my life….iszit family?iszit ballet?iszit my fren?iszit my bf?iszit skaing?i think and think….and finally i got the answer 1day and i realize tat i’ve been miss ice skating so much….it’s like i never been so happy in my life b4 until i remember it was my easter holidays tat i went back and went skating with regina….sigh….really miss those time tt we had la…really dun wish  the time flies so fast….since then i know wat i’m missing in my life…it’s SKATING!!!!i’ve been having so much fun in skating and i’ve been learning alot of things from there and hell i know why am i so into it now…sigh…now i really wish2 go back kl again and skating cz here in melbourne skating rink it’s so far away and not only tat it’s so expensive2 skate over here…and now i know y they dun skate over here already only skates when they r back in KL…hheehe…. here u can see how much fun i hav when i;m in skating class…haha..yea..i love skating…laugh at me but i love it!!!! but at least in this pics u can see how happy i am loo….

and this r some pics tat i hav wid me in melb hav fun laa…

1st pic is pic of SSB’s girls in LAVISH,2nd pic is me and Emma from cheer,3rd pic is me and my best fren Anna….we are damn close…i still remember what all my teachers said to us…they dont like me and her working together in a group or partner cause we are just one perfect partner for each other…i’m like…..WTH!!!!when ever we work together as a team we always look the best and do loads of funny and stupid things together…we also hang out together when ever we have time and we miss each other too when ever we have holidays and sometimes we just cant help it just have meet up in ome place…not only both of us but also the whole class….till than i’ll keep u update laa when ever i ogt more pics or more story now hav to study le…got exam tmr…..hehe…vocal exam…scared laa…now no lau shi wid me and hav 2 do exam…damn scared laa….anyway i know i can do it de…cz i’m lau shi’s student maa….hehe…"YES I CAN DE"

Hey all…after a long rest from not doing any blog…and here i am again before my exam coming up…hm..sigh…actually i miss a lot of things laa…dun noe y i like lost a lot of things like tat…hmm…like wat ar?hmmm..like ballet la…i dun hav teacher with me or to teach me la….u noe la..me hav2 be push only will be good de…now miss liew not here with me and all my classmates all so good plus they have already do 2years of advance1 le…i only few months only..how ar???die laa…i really sometime dun noe wat2 do during ballet class…and i hav2 learn everthing by heart or b4 going in to class cz all of them noe the work le….the teacher just say learn as much as u can laa…since u just join the class…yes the teacher did ask me wanna take exam enot but i really hav no canfidence to take exam now laa….almost everytime after class i alsocry in the toilet b4 going back….sigh,,,,really tired of my life here laa…sometime i felt like dun do anything but i told myself i cant cause i promise teacher tat i will finish my study here and pass with flying colours….i’;ve been missing alot of things from teacher le….and i miss skating so much tat i sometime take my pocket money to go skating rink and sometime hav class with the coach here….i really did try to 4get about skating but sorry i cant….dun noe y…and i’vve been practicing my off ice without noticing it….sigh…dun noe y la…just felt like going back to kl ASAP now cause cant stand the life here….i felt so lonely here and u might see me very happy here wo but tat’s just actting only cause i dun 1 ppl noe tat i not happy….and now exam coming u le…lagi die la me…everything is soooooo not prepared yet and assignments not done yet laundry not done yet everything not done yet….dah la i cant use my right hand to do anyhting now hurt like hell…:’(i really wanna learn skating back la….wanna tell mum about tis but i really dun noe how2 tell her tat i wanna learn skating….sigh….without skating is like missing something in part of my body….sigh….stress la now…exam in 2weeks….and next week no class but hav2 go back uni for 1st exam where teacher will only sit in class and not doing any and we have to do our things do collect marks….die la now…..ballet so cham now…i felt so lost in class….now i hav only 1 word to say only….

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

Hi,i’m back again after a long break of not writting any blog.I’ve been so busy with everything over here and not forgetting about my reports that have to be hand in by next week.

well…it’s hard to say it cause i’m not sure if i’m right about tis cause i’ve been hearing lots of gossips bout "C" and me…i dun 1 tis to be a big deal…and i’m not sure if he have feeling for me as he knows tat i’m still waiting 4 some1 although i cant be with "F"(ppl tat i’m waiting)but i’m just gonna take tis easy…

i feel lonely sometime felt like crying but just dun know who to goes to as i hav not many fren over here.Yes i really wanna know the truth but i just dun know how 2 tell F and yes i hav feeling 4 him too…he’s been treating me so good and well and he’s cares a lot for me…never met some1 like F b4 and i dun know how i get along with this or when i start to hav feeling for him…i din want him to know about tis.Even if F likes some1 else and not me i’m still fine with it anyway i haven been really dating for quite long time already. As long as he’s happy i’m happy for him too…

and yes i heard some1(B) said he hav feeling4 me but i told B NO wat B thinks is not true cz it is not true and i tot B was jealous bout wat he think about F…recently i turn to B and said tat "i think F hav feeling 4 me but i’m not sure if i’m right". B told me to zip my mouth bout tis cz if i were to ask F and the answer is no which mean it’s hard4 us to come along as fren too…i did told B about it i’m not gonna tell or ask F anything and i still wanna be fren with F. wat If i’m wrong on tis feeling very pei seh le…..so it’sbetter to zip my mouth about tis till F turn to me and tell me the whole things…

DO YOU THINK I’M RIGHT FOR WHAT I’M DOING???

need some1 to lean to,need some1 to care for,need some1 to hold me close,need some1 to love me beisdes families,need some1 to do anything with me,need some1 to keeps me warm and need some1 for everything…i dun know who to go for now…. been so confused lately….

PS:Who Does He Really Love?hope to know this soon!!!!

Hey all…i’m doing quite good in Melbourne.Currently studyung at Victoria University and also doing ballet class with Australia Ballet Company..wow….you wouldnt gonna believe me…i join the open class and it was like…bazarrrrr…….gonna like it over here but without miss liew guide me in class,i’m kindda lost in class as i’m so used to her way of teaching…the school ask me join advance1 class but i dont think i’m that good for it…i told them that i not good for advance1 class but advance foundation is ok for me and they said they do not have advance foundation…die die die….dont know wat to do now laa….SERIOUSLY without my teacher miss liew i can not do anything….but that’s life….you have to learn new things in your life all the time..and now i’m starting to love my new life over here but not love life…as i still cant be happy with him…haha..dun ask me y but yes….he haven have enough time for me or with me….i’m starting to think that i’m a doll/ball/an object to him already as he didnt really ask about my daily life or even my study life in uni(as in a new place)he din even bother to ask me anthing about it…like just now we took tram to city and i actually felt the pain from class and cheerleading practice he dun even bother to ask me when did i hurt my hands and just ask you hurt ur hand again??i’m like what the fuck???u actually ask me tat question but not asking me about how did u hurt ur hand….gosh…i’m sooooooo dissapointe with u already…

Come on even my fren gets to know tat i hurt my hands from all classes dun tell me tat u din know…and u know i’m sooooo bloody tired from class already and i have to do my reports all the time and you dare to tell me that why am i always busy with work….GOSH!!!!!i seriously dont know what to say….and when ever i ask you to learn more english you were like telling me later or something to do with ur fren…if u think ur fren can really hel u in english i dun see why are you not improving your english loo…as you said you’re here in aussie for like a year and half already but i dont see or hear any assent from you loo…or your english got better loo…sometime i really dun know what u think…and sometime i really dont know wanna speaks to u in english or what….as u know my chinese is not good….it makes me felt so hard to talk to you in chinese…

sometime u said i’m angry…yes i am cz i dun know how 2 communicate with u laa…and u dun even bother to do your uni things as u know u gonna kick back if u cant find any uni or school over here…and u’re like taking it sooooooooo bloody easy….gosh…what are you thinking CL??u cant always blame me for not being there with you all the time….and like few days back,,, i ask him to spare time with me since im back in the city early and he said he’s busy with his cousins…i’m like,,,,what the fuck is that??cousin is more important than me…i’m his gf le….and like just now he ask me to pack thing over to his house on sunday(in rude way) as i’ll be going to sunbury campus for few days and he even told me tat he’s not free on saturday(whole day)and guess what??he’ll be telling me that he’s with his friends in somewhere….you call this your gf???i dont think so loo….

My friends even give me a hand on my moving in loo…and u said u’re busy with friend’s moving in…and guess what???i dindt sleep whole night just to clean the house….thanks to you i suppose….i told him that my mum s coming over next month and huess what he told me????dont even think of asking me to bring your mum around…i’m like what the hell???bring someone’s else mum around can but not mine…..fine i dont mine about this….you dont even bother to come to me and say i’ll fetch you back home when you reach melb.(u did ask me wanna me rent a car from fren enot laa…)but dun u think is not good?u know me…if u ask i sure say no but if u just say tat u’re coming to fetch me….tat’s a different story….Rico,will and raymond even offer me to fetch or bring me to the airport but why not you??i’vebeen waiting for you to ask…but you didnt…it’s ok….i dun mind….sometime i thinks u’re more than a fren to me than a bf loo….if u thinks friendsare more important than a gf than i would love to be one of your friend loo…not gf loo…i’m so tired of all this always….one more thing…you gets jealous so easily….but why dont you just think of why do i hang out with my friends(new) than hanging around with you??cause when ever i goes out with you…all you want from me is to "give you face"and to listen to u…..(HEY…I’M NOT YOUR MAID)but when ever i hang around with my friends i feel so free so talk or act or even to jump around….unlike being with your group of friends…i enjoy the days that we spend while all your "heng dai" still not back here yet loo….you have more time with me and ask me more about me…(gets to know me more)

CL seriously if u are still being like this…i really dont know how are we gonna goes along together….dont be so lazy….and you love to use $$ to makes ppl happy but sorry not for me…it works with other girls but not me…..remember that!!!!!!hope in times you improve for me….if you still think i’m your girl…..

ps:i’m being very serious about this matter….dont think i’m fulling around with you or just wants people to know about my life over here….

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY to everyone around the world!!!well…it’s been a hard day for me during this valentine’s day cause i dont really have a date not to mention that i have no one to date with but the person that i wanna date is way too far away from me so i just have lunch and dinner with my ex shoolmates and also ex classmates and also some close friends!!!haha…it’s not too bad tho to have a single valentine’s day with all single friends around me!!!^^i’m glad that i’m not the only one to have single valentine’s day this year cause last year i was really having a bad time.While i’m with my kor kor having dinner tat time his gf played the piano at the place and everyone was like so shock of hearing my kor kor name cause all of us thought that his gf was in US and we didnt have any news of her coming back for holidays and kor kor actually cried in front of the table where everyone was looking at him…

i did asked kor kor the next day why he dare to cry in front of everyone and he told me that when you’re touched by someone you wont care of embaressing already!!!just let your feeling comes out!!well..i think my kor kor it’s true about it!!!!they are so romantic laa…dont know how the valentine’s day for them le this year???

well!!!this year i didnt really have as nice as my previous valentine cause i’m in melbourne and not many people knows that i’m here so i dont know if anyone sent parcel to me or any other things to me enot loo….but anyway i still like the teddy CL gave to me and the Dress Ken gave to me!!!and thanks for the lovely rosesses Sam gave to me!!!love you lots!!!but you know my heart is still with someone else right….please give me sometime to forget him 1st before we go further ok ma??

class starting soon already!!!sob sob have to concentrate on my studies jor cant play play jor…dont know why i have this feeling of crying when i’m alone in the room laa..and i’ll starts to think of him(YH)dont know why laa…really!!!I WANT TO 4GET HIM!!!!!can anyone help me to get him off of my head??just cant wait to smack him laa…if i ever see him again??and why is he kept bothering me le??i mean in msn…dun noe laa…just felt like he’s putting all the blame on me tat’s all…sigh!!!!nvm laa…let him be loo….anyway…i know i can find a better 1 then him loo…(i think i found 1 jor)haha..but cant be with him yet cz so far laa…haha…lol…

ps:CL the teddy you gave me damn big laa…how to hug le???only can put on the bed le…

hey all i’m ok here in melbourne and dont you worry i’m fine here and having loads of fun….today i din do much cz feel so lazy le…and let rayL kacau me up…but both of us ended up sleeping in the train tat we took 2 glan….and came back2 city by 3something so we both go look 4 alvin at novotel hotel in the darling tower….haha both of us got lost and ended up we said "you seeee….we took long road 2here…lol"but it was fun walking in such cold weather…lol…..and wen we reach audrey’s house we took out dinner and after tat i sleep loooooooo muahahaha…yea u can say all u can i only eat and sleep over here and do nth cz class hven start yet…hehe…okla…dun noe wat2 write liou wanna sleep again…kekekeke